Working Nights

picnic, imeverymum, working nights, night shift, children
Working Nights

About 6 weeks ago whilst chatting to a friend online I decided to apply for a job working night shifts.  This was around the same time we decided to send the children to Private School and therefore obviously needed some extra income.  Life has been a little crazy since then as there has been so much to sort but I am so happy that all of this was set in motion.

I had an interview and then due to the nature of the job had to wait for my DBS certificate so I had a while to get used to the fact that I would be working again.  It has been so long since I had a ‘real’ job.  I have been self-employed for so long it was really nerve wracking going for an interview.  As I was applying for night shifts though I don’t think I had much competition.

I opted to work nights as I want to still be at home with the children until they start school.  No offence to the Mums that work 9-5 (we’re all just doing our best aren’t we to make ends meet) I just really wanted to be at home with them for as long as I could before they go off to school.  James’ wage was enough that we could cope until Eden went to school but with now needing to pay school fees a job for myself was very much needed.

I had to work two full weeks in the days on induction and that was very strange.  The children hated me being away, especially Judah who I kept finding curled up at the end of our bed when I awoke.  It was a huge change for him at nearly 3.  I guess at an earlier age it just becomes normal as their routines aren’t as firmly set.

Of course we have Martina who was prepared for having them extra, and also my Mum was on call to help the days that she wasn’t working.  So Martina spent some days over at my Mums and my Mum spent a day at our home.  They made it work bless them.  The hardest part for me was that my induction days happened to fall around Judah’s 3rd Birthday.  I hated not being with him on his birthday but James took the day off so that he could take him out to do something nice and we gave Martina the day off which she definitely deserved.

I assured my little man that I won’t be working in the day again, James told him that I would be working nights though so he was all confused with my leaving for work at 9:45.  Obviously he was in bed and blissfully unaware but because Daddy had told him before he went to bed he was all anxious about it.

When I started this post, we had Martina, but it has been sat in my drafts for a while.  Judah is just starting to ease up as my shadow.  I am finding it challenging shall we say without help in the days, but on the whole we are doing really well.  I have been going to visit my Mum or my sister who have been really helpful letting me steal a nap here and there.

Of course I am exhausted and my body is adjusting but I’m so happy that I am able to earn some money for our family and still be able to be with my beautiful babies in the day.

I’m really enjoying working and knowing I’m doing something worth while.  I’ve met some lovely people already and don’t feel as isolated anymore as a Mum of four that was usually only ever with the children.  Going back to work before the children are at school isn’t for everyone, and I’m not sure I would’ve done it had it not been night shifts, but just to encourage any of you out there thinking about it.  The worst that can happen is that it doesn’t work out for you and you hand in your notice.  I’m very pleased I made this choice and look forward to what it can make possible for our family.

So what are you waiting for?   What’s the worst that can happen?

picnic, imeverymum, working nights, night shift, children
They’re so worth it!

My Life with a Dyspraxic

handsome husband, dyspraxic, dyspraxia awareness, imeverymum

It’s Dyspraxia Awareness Week and as my husband has severe dyspraxia, I decided I would take part in the awareness raising.

Reading through the list of symptoms on the dyspraxia foundation website really made me chuckle. It sounds awful that it’s comical to me if you are a severe sufferer, but my husband and I have learnt to live with it and I find it endearing (most of the time).  Things I forget can be related and I get at him frequently for include ‘Slow to finish a task. May daydream and wander about aimlessly,’ ‘Difficulty in following instructions, especially more than one at time,’ and ‘Difficulty in planning and organising thought.’

One of the main reoccurring rows with my husband happens when I am having a hormonal day and I decide that he can’t love me very much as he NEVER plans anything for us to do. I am a compulsive planner, he laughs at me for having a list for everything ie. I composed a Christmas list for each of the things I want to buy our children in August, and have been purchasing from it and wrapping presents since August. I will spend a lot of time planning things like his birthday, surprises and just all of our family life in general. All the day to day running of what we are doing, or where we are taking the kids, how we are making our ridiculously busy Saturday happen is all by my design and we usually stick to the plans. Even writing this now makes me realise that I have to reassure myself that it is definitely not because he doesn’t love me that he doesn’t do any of these things. It is because he has Dyspraxia.

Reading through the list of symptoms makes me cherish all the things he strives hard to overcome so that we can live as normally as possible. He is a fantastic cook, despite the fact that he finds it difficult. He is currently learning to drive, which he finds especially difficult. This is something I know my encouragement (which he never had in the past) can really help. I 100% believe that he can conquer driving, it will eventually click and become like breathing, it just requires more effort for him to get there than the average person.

I treasure the events that he has planned for me in the 3 and a half years we’ve been together. My amazing proposal at the ‘Titanic Spa’ (highly recommend by the way), my beautiful engagement ring he designed and had made, my 30th Birthday which he had really put the effort in for, so despite my family life crashing around me at the time I made sure we didn’t cancel. It was a lovely escape for 24 hours from a nightmare situation. He took me to the ‘BroadOaks Country House’ which was a beautiful boutique hotel. A lot of thought always goes in to getting me to these places, especially as at the time neither of us drove.

When you’re as easy going and full of good humour as my husband is, you can see the funny side. The first time he met my family, he was soaking wet through from falling in a lake near their house. When he met some of my friends, we discovered that it’s worse when he’s nervous. He walked into 7 different lamp posts on a 10 minute walk home. On our wedding day my maid of honour was in hysterics, as he managed to fall off a chair whilst just sitting comfortably and signing the register. The registrar nearly didn’t let us wed as they were debating if he was drunk.

The amount of times that he has fallen down the stairs, I stopped asking if he’s ok, I just listen to hear that he’s still moving. My friends think that I’m cold, but it is such a normal occurrence in our lives, it used to make my heart stop with fear as I was so afraid of him hurting himself, but I guess I’m now just desensitised to it all. The most random being the time he went to fix under our bath and set himself on fire. He couldn’t find a torch and decided it would be a good idea to take a candle into the enclosed space so he could see what he was doing.

He has most of the symptoms on the link above, no specific hand that he writes with, sets knives and forks the wrong way round at the table, very forgetful, clumsy, but he doesn’t let it stop him doing ANYTHING.

He joined in with football on the local youth project that we used to work with. He has an interesting way of dancing but still joins in with the girls when they play Just Dance on the wii. He has definitely shown me that it doesn’t hold him back at all.

When I ask him what the most annoying part of having dyspraxia is for him, he answers, ‘struggling with organisation’. Even with that though, I am so proud of him as a Social Worker there is SO much paperwork. He has just finished his final year at University, I was pregnant throughout his first 2 years at Uni, we had a newborn whilst he was on each of his placements, and he is still finished 2% off a First Class Degree. I am so proud of all that he achieves, and need to remember to cut him some slack when he fails to remember things I ask him to do (even if I have written them in a list, lol).

It is a very misunderstood condition. We are still learning to adjust to it everyday, but I must stress my husband is living proof that having dyspraxia does not need to define you, and it doesn’t need to prevent you from achieving anything you want in life. I’m not saying it doesn’t make it harder than some of the rest of us have it, but ANYTHING is possible if you’re determined enough.

Writing this post has reminded me, I’m proud of you babe, proud to call you mine, and I’m excited for all you will continue to achieve in the future. Nothing holds you back.

Dyspraxia Awareness Week 12th – 18th October 2014.

18 Days of Summer #11

summer holidays, cute boys hairstyles, the boo
18 Days of Summer #11

 

 Today was the most stressful day I’ve had in a long time.  We had decided last night despite my anxiety that we would travel down to Worthing on Tuesday and allocate today as a rest day for me, so that I would be ready to do the 6 hour drive (not including stops) with 4 children on my own.  I felt happy with our decision, but awoke to a text from my mother-in-law with a different suggestion for us.
After a lot of back and forths, we had come to the conclusion that they didn’t want us to come down, we weren’t welcome for whatever reason (this would be very out of character) and I was getting so stressed out with all the extra thought processing whilst I was supposed to be resting.  We decided we would just forget travelling down altogether.
When we finally spoke to James’ Dad on the phone, we realised they really wanted us to come.  They had set up the whole house ready for our arrival and had even slept on the sofa bed downstairs the night before as they didn’t want to ruin the room they had prepared for us.  The truth was that they really wanted us to come down, but were trying to balance that out and not make us feel pressured as they were aware that I have been having some anxiety issues and whilst James is looking for a job there are financial pressures.  This had resulted in us being so confused with all the alternatives we kept being offered and thinking we weren’t wanted.  Bizarre.
Anyway, that was finally cleared up and we set about preparing to come down.  I have had a dreadful cold, maybe, just hayfever, hard to tell as I can’t take any antihistamines with breastfeeding Eden.

The children enjoyed a relaxed day watching movies and performing shows for us.  The girls decided that as they weren’t having a ‘cute girls hairstyle’ today, they would give Judah a ‘cute boys hairstyle.’  So funny, he loved it and kept it in all day.  James and I called it ‘the boo’ as that’s what he reminded us of, from Monsters Inc.

The rest of the evening was spent packing, so hardly an action packed day of fun for the children, but they still had a lovely day.  Sometimes, I feel so much pressure to make every day exciting for them.  I guess that’s what us mum’s do in the Summer Holidays, but especially for the girls as in the future we would aim to go away somewhere with them, like the year we went to Butlins.  When you go away there’s always entertainment for them, so you don’t have to think, or feel guilty because they’re entertained.  It doesn’t do them any hard to have a relaxed day every once in a while.

‘The Princess’ made me laugh so much with her idea of packing.  I told her it would be cold and this is what she packed in her trunki.  I guess a princess can never be under prepared for potential royal engagements.

I downloaded ‘Turbo’ onto the iPad in case the children were bored in the car.  I’ve not seen it, so hoping to get chance myself at some point.  Ignoring my anxiety, I was prepared to travel the next day.

James and I got to bed very late and I set my alarm for 3:30am tomorrow.  This didn’t leave much time.  Not the best of days, but hey, this is a realistic account of our blended family life.

*pictures displayed are just random photographs I captured today, as opposed to details of what we were up to.  Apologies for a boring blog day.

18 Days of Summer #9

18 Days of Summer #9

A more relaxed summer day today, as James stayed in bed most of the morning, he must have needed it.  It was throwing it down outside early so I started to plan in my head for a rainy day.  I booked us in to the cinema as planned for the evening, this made sense as I thought it would hardly be a beautiful summer evening for sunset strolls on the beach.

Slowly sorted breakfast, which ended up being in shifts rather than a family meal, Judah had eaten about 6 am when I’d taken him downstairs as he was up early.  The girls then ate about 8:30 after they’d been up and running around for a while.  Eden had her breakfast when she emerged with her Daddy about 9:30/10ish, I can’t remember what time James woke up.

I then commenced doing the girls hairstyles that they had been busy choosing.

braided flower tie back
braided flower tie back

Shayla-Rae had the ‘braided flower tie back‘ although her hair wasn’t really long enough, her flower looks more like a little rosebud, but hey, it’s the one she wanted.

knotted headband
knotted headband

I actually really loved doing Isis’ hair.  She opted for the ‘knotted headband‘ which although fiddly, I really enjoyed doing.  James wanted to get involved, so a crocodile clip was replaced with him holding some hair (bless) and I almost felt like I was weaving or something.  Anyways, it’s a fun one to do and I think it looks great.  This is definitely making it into my favourite school hairstyles list.

Once we had finished getting ready, the early risers (the babies) needed a nap, oh well.  Off went Judah and Eden for a nap and I made everyone some cheese and ham toasties.  Children love toasties, what a great invention, it’s just a sandwich, that can seem so bland sometimes, but just add some heat and pressure, and voila, something they think is exciting to eat.  I made Judah and Eden’s ready for when they woke, so that it would not be hot and I wouldn’t have to start faffing when they woke up hungry.

After lunch we helped my Mum clean up for tomorrow’s festivities – it’s my brother Jacob’s 21st and everyone is coming to my Mum’s for a meal.  16 people for dinner after a family of 6 has invaded your home for a week is a bit much, so we helped tidy up (as best we could, she’s fussy about how she likes things done).  Then I guess the festivities of the week caught up with me.  I ended up napping on the sofa in the front room for an hour and a half whilst the girls played in the back garden.   When I awoke there was just enough time to sort out nappies that needed changing, clothes for children (Judah had been napping in just a t-shirt),  My Mum volunteered to watch Eden and the rest of us went off to munch some chips before the cinema.

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This was literally all that we had time to munch.  We arrived at the cinema in time to find a carpark ticket, collect our 3D glasses, buy a large popcorn between us, and in we went to the cinema.

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This was the first time that Judah had been to the cinema where he was a paying customer who I expected to watch the movie.  His first film was ‘The Dark Knight Rises’ when he was a tiny baby and just in the buggy.  Shayla-Rae hadn’t been to the cinema for a long time.  She doesn’t remember when we took her to see ‘Tinkerbell – the secret of the wings’ or whatever it was called haha two Christmas’s ago.  We had arrived whilst the trailers were on and the house lights were down.  Shayla was petrified to even walk down the slight incline to find seats, you’d think I was trying to push her off the edge of a cliff to her death.  We got there in the end.  Judah was very reluctant to wear his glasses, until in the movie he realised the picture was better.

We watched ‘The Unbeatables’ – I am really sorry if you have seen it and enjoyed it, but James and I could not believe how horrendous the plotline was.  The children loved it so I guess that’s all that matters.  We just felt that they had spent so much time making the 3D effects cool, that they forgot the plotline.  Put it this way, my favourite part was the last half hour which was based around a football match – yep!

Outside the cinema was the most beautiful sunset, I was so annoyed that I had run out of battery on the DSLR and snapped a quick pic on James’ iphone.  It just doesn’t do it justice.  I think James thought we could grab a romantic one of us and Isis offered to take it.  She took a beautiful photo of the sky and her finger haha.  Better luck next time James, sorry.

my effort with the iphone
my effort with the iphone

When we returned home it was bedtime, I took the girls hair out for whilst they slept and they had cuddles with Eden.  We had kisses and cuddles and off they went.

snuggling with Eden on the sofa
snuggling with Eden on the sofa

It was one of those nights were Judah and Eden just wouldn’t settle, an hour later, James and I still had bed invaders…

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we finally settled them and got snuggled down for the evening.  Early start tomorrow morning as James is serving on Kids church and we have a lot longer drive than usual, and the children will all need a bath.  Excited to hang out with the family for my little brother’s 21st.

Hope you all enjoy the bank holiday, we’ll be driving down to Worthing, West Sussex and hoping the traffic isn’t too terrible.  Think of me driving a 6 hour journey (minus toilet stops) with four children.  If you get time to say a little prayer, please do.

THE ORDINARY MOMENTS #3 {BEING A DANCE MUM}

The Ordinary Moments #3 {Being a Dance Mum}

I’ve been doing a mini blog series with the children as we are in the middle of 18 days holiday with the girls.  18 whole days with my big blended family, and I am loving it.  If you want to follow our series it’s called ’18 Days of Summer’ the most recent post is here.  As we’ve been documenting EVERYTHING that has been happening in the week, my Ordinary Moments post this week is a throwback to the girls final week at dance before breaking up for the Summer.  I love being a Dance Mum even if it does take up most of my weekend.

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The girls absolutely love their dancing lessons, and it’s a good job really because when I was on maternity and James was studying it seemed to cost the earth.  They both do ballet, tap and modern, and they are really good at it.  Going to watch them in their recent production was one of our proudest moments as parents.  Obviously, we may be a bit biased but we felt that they stood out in their respective dance numbers as they usually had the most pointed toes and biggest smiles.  Also, they both have spindly legs but it was more the toes and smiles thing *winks.*

At the end of every term they have a week ‘watching week’ where us Dance Mums and Dads can sit in on the classes and see where the children are up to.  This was the first one since Christmas due to the show and it was lovely to see how far the girls had come.

watching week 2

It’s amazing to think that Shayla has been there nearly 3 years and she is still only 4.  She’ll be 5 in September, we didn’t send her to dance lessons before she could walk (pushy mother alert).  I love seeing how confident it has made the girls and has been one of our greatest investments into them, not just financial but the time commitments.  When they were rehearsing for the show they would be at the Dance Academy for 6 hours EVERY Saturday, when this is the only real day we got to spend with them, this season was hard.  We missed them, but knew that it only comes round once every 3 years and it would be an amazing opportunity for them to perform to show standard on a big stage.  They loved it!!!  When you’re a Dance Mum sometimes you feel like a dance widow.

We’re going into a season of exams now as again, due to the show, exams were put on hold.  Both girls have progressed so well, and the Dance Academy principle has told Isis that she is ready to do an exam in each genre in this autumn term coming up.  Exams are another huge time commitment, they have to attend coaching classes in addition to their Saturday regular classes for each exam they’re taking.  We as parents have to attend too, take notes and make sure we practice with them at home (they get a CD with the exam music on to take home).  It’s an interesting time for finances too, as each exam can be between £60-£70 each, with the coaching classes, CD’s, and the exam cost, not to mention any new uniforms they may need as they need to be pristine for the exam itself.

watching week 3

 This watching week the girls weren’t in their uniforms as I had arrived back from a conference in London at 3am that morning, and had met the girls and ‘other mummy’ at the Dance Academy, so they just came in some comfy clothes.  For the purpose of my photos though, I quite like it, as it’s easy to spot who’s ours.
watching week 4
It’s lovely for the girls to have another strong constant in their lives too, I know that as they grow up these girls (and boys) will be their friends.  The bonds that they’ll make in rehearsals for shows and through moving up grades and doing exams together will be strong.  As a former teacher at this particular academy too, I taught music theatre and popular music, I am strong advocate for exams, they are good practice for them as people and the things life throws at them as they grow older.  Also, the big plus, in my opinion and the only reason I would encourage vocal pupils to take them, was due to UCAS points.  Once they get to a certain standard, their exams start counting towards getting them on to the courses they may wish to take at university.  Ok, a long way ahead at the moment, but, especially if a child is more creative than academically gifted, this can be a huge plus.
watching week 5
On a Saturday it doesn’t get any more ordinary for us (well, in term time) to be found at the Dance Academy or Costa Coffee in the shopping centre adjacent whilst waiting for them to finish their classes.  Judah will be starting Beginners Ballet in September.  He absolutely loves dancing and jumping around, I don’t see this as something we will encourage long term unless he loves it and wants to continue, but it definitely teaches discipline, having to sit when instructed, they learn co-ordination, timing and rhythms and so an increased understanding of musicality.  I am sure that he will love it, but we’ll see how it goes.
watching week 6
Do you think I’m biased?  Do you think our girls stand out for their poise, or just their outfits?
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18 DAYS OF SUMMER #10 {HAPPY 21ST BIRTHDAY JACOB}

18 Days of Summer #10 {Happy 21st Birthday Jacob}

Today was a day of mixed emotions, we were celebrating my brothers 21st birthday, and going back home from our summer stay at Nana and Grandad’s.  We had to be up early and head out to church, it’s further to travel from my Mum’s and James was on Kids team so had to be there an hour and a half early.  My Dad packed half of our things into his car so that when we traveled back home in the evening we’d have room for everything.  The girls had only packed summer dresses (my fault for not checking) so had brought things in two shifts earlier in the week.  My wonderful Mum had helped me get straight with our mountainous washing whilst we were there too, so we had lots to take home.

The children all needed baths, so that was a quick job and hair was put into dutch-braided pigtails with a zigzag parting.  Nice and neat, meant that they could have curly hair later.

We all chilled out whilst James was setting up the kids room in the baby area upstairs at church.  I’ve said in a previous Sunday post has cosy the baby area is.

After church, we headed back to my parents (after dropping off some things at home) and we all hung out with family before Jacob’s birthday meal.  The children love hanging out with my extended family and my brothers and sisters always spoil them with affection and gifts when they can.  My Nan and Grandad came, my two brothers came, my sister (Auntie Jenny), my cousin, family friends, as you can imagine, it was a bit of a houseful.

After dinner, I disappeared upstairs for a while.  I began to have a lot of anxiety about driving down to Worthing tomorrow.  It hit me that I have to drive on Bank Holiday Monday when it will be busy, maybe lots of traffic jams, there are weather warnings for the South of the UK and I will have four children in the car.  Hmm…. I don’t think this was an irrational anxiety.  Started debating what I should be doing, and also packing up the rest of our things ready to go home for the evening (whatever else happened).
My Mum was sad that we were leaving, the girls presented her with some flowers which I had chosen.  I knew they were her favourite, and they thanked her for having us.  I’m sure my Mum is glad to have her home back, no more pooey nappies, potty training babies, Peppa Pig *snorts* on the telly, but she was definitely sad to see us leave too.

I started having panic attacks about all we had to do.  James packed up the car, my brother looked after Eden.  The children ran riot for a while.  The girls asked to speak to their Mum for the first time.  I guess 10 days is a long time to be away.  We tried calling but couldn’t get through, we would try again tomorrow.

We got home, debated what to do tomorrow, decided that travelling down Bank Holiday with a weather warning would be foolish, and James rebooked himself on the National Express for the following day, and a train down to Worthing from London.  I felt better about this and planned a rest day for tomorrow so that I’m fresh to drive down on Tuesday nice and early.  Also, we have to organise and pack the car properly.  Travelling with so many children is very stressful.

Looking forward to my rest day tomorrow.  Anyone else driven the length of the country with four children 8 and under on their own?  Any tips?  They will be greatly appreciated.

18 DAYS OF SUMMER #8

18 Days of Summer #8

Today we were able to celebrate my Dad’s birthday as a family.  We were unable to attend the birthday meal my Mum hosted the weekend of his actual birthday as we had made commitments before anything was planned.  So, we took him out for breakfast at the local carvery.

We had to wait until 9am when it opened, so much harder on these light summer mornings, so first the girls chose some hairstyles again :

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Isis went for the triple braided tie back.

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Shayla had the ponytail bow.  I was trying to distract myself as I was very hungry.  We packed up all that the children may need and when everyone was ready, off we went out for breakfast.

It was lovely all being out together.  Eden even joined in, munching a banana I had brought her and then some toast.  She looked so sweet sat at the table with everyone.  Judah was amazing considering how tired he was, he kicked off at one point, and I struggled to find somewhere that wasn’t fun for him to sit and do his time-out – this ended up being in the corner of the entrance.  The irony as he sat there performing on a mat that said ‘Welcome,’  I would’ve taken a picture but I hadn’t carried the camera with me to perform his time-out, as it’s not usually a moment that he or I would like to capture.

The girls enjoyed their huge breakfasts, we were all set up for the day and didn’t need to eat again (apart from the little guzzler that is Eden) until our evening meal.  They enjoyed clinking their glasses fruit shoots together with us, as we remembered that we were there to celebrate ‘Grandad’s’ birthday.

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this one was still eating as we were trying to leave
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Isis unhappy as I was making her finish the sausage on her fork

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 In our hasty dash for breakfast we had forgotten to put the Bugaboo Donkey back in the car boot so we had to go back to my parents afterwards before we could continue our day of fun.  Once we had the buggy in the car, we were off again, this time we went to play Crazy Golf.
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 Crazy golf was hilarious, it was like a massive free for all.  They were so excited because they’d not done it before that it was very difficult to get them to take turns or listen to instruction.  I had Eden with me so I couldn’t really get on to the course with them.  My sister ‘Auntie Jenny’ then arrived to come and spend the day with us, so she watched Eden for me and then I could go and snap some pictures of my little golfers.  They started to get the hang of it by about hole 8 of 9, so hopefully if we go again, Crazy Golf won’t be quite as crazy.
After Crazy Golf the girls were going to go water zorbing, on the lake so I thought we could head off the complaining if Judah got to go on the trampolines first.  He loves the trampolines bless him, jumping and singing for joy.  It’s so lovely getting to watch him do things that he loves.
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 The girls decided to join in and sing whilst he was jumping.
Also, they made me laugh when they started telling him to leap, which Judah thought was the word ‘sleep.’  As, you can imagine, him lying down to sleep wasn’t really the best way of spending his 10 minutes that we’d paid for.  So funny!
Then it was the girls turn to go water zorbing.  Isis has been able to go a few times over the years, Shayla is only just old enough and really impressed us last time (which was her first time), so when she asked again, of course we allowed her.  This time she didn’t seem to dare stand up though, not sure if that’s because this time she was in a dress instead of leggings.  Mental note – bring leggings next time we’re heading to St Annes.
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Next we took them to the children to go in the boats on the lake.  Isis decided she wanted to peddle with Daddy (although, I’m pretty sure he did most of the work).  I sat in the back with Judah and Shayla-Rae and Auntie Jenny (bless her) kept Eden on the shore, as she was ready for a sleep.  The girls wanted to play pirates.  So funny.  This resulted in us playing Bumper Boats with the other willing boaters on the lake, who I think had all wanted to play too but no-one wanted to offend anyone.  Our children just shouted at the other boaters ‘we want to crash into you!’ to which people said, ‘that’s what they want to do’ referring to their children.  So, a game of bumper boats was enjoyed by all.
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 We had to go back in after about 15 minutes (you get 45 minutes) as Eden was crying with Auntie Jenny, and a random lady was trying to take Eden off her determined that she would be able to settle her.  Why is it that complete strangers do this when it comes to babies?  I don’t see anyone offering to settle my screaming toddler when he’s having a paddy.  Poor Jennifer, we went back to rescue her.  She had sent the lady packing.  My sister makes me laugh, she looks sweet and usually won’t say boo to a goose, but if you cross her, she has some bite.  Love her so much.
I started to worry about not being able to replenish suncream at this stage, we all have very fair skin and we’d run out after the last application.  So, the children were allowed to go on the train and then the play park briefly and then we headed back to Nana’s cafe for a drink.
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yummy chocolate milkshakes

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sleepy Judah deciding what he’d like to drink

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Auntie Jenny, the baby rescuer

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 We left the girls with Nana, they wanted to join her going food shopping.  James, Judah, Eden, Auntie Jenny and I went back to attend the boys hairdressing appointment.  Judah’s fringe needed sorting after the lady near us butchering it about a month ago, and James was going for his routine hair cut.  I was getting sick of my hair just being flat to my head all the time.  With two babies there is no time to be spent styling my hair.  I remembered about 6 years ago, the last time my hair was this length I had a block fringe.  I asked the barber to chop me a fringe in whilst I was there (he’s a friend) and he gladly obliged.
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Judah having his fringe fixed, he never performs for Pete, he must trust him

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selfie taken infront of my grandad, I was trying to be discreet hence the serious face

I made a broccoli and cauliflower cheese bake, well, James and I did, Eden started screaming so James took over, for dinner which went along with my Mum’s ‘chicken recipe’ (original title I know) that she was making for my Grandad.  The children then had ice-cream for dessert and were in bed for just after 8.

They were thoroughly tired out and fast asleep by the time I got back from driving Auntie Jenny home.

Tomorrow 10 days left start counting down which makes me feel sad, but I will try not to think about it and just enjoy the time that we have left.  We’ll be heading to the cinema tomorrow evening to watch ‘The Unbeatables’ in 3D.  Only £3.50 in the small St Anne’s cinema ‘The Island‘ which I think is an amazing bargain.  It will be Judah’s first 3D movie, I’m really looking forward to his reaction.

18 DAYS OF SUMMER #7

18 Days of Summer #7

Today was a random day to be in the middle of our summer holiday, but last week my friend passed away and his wife asked me to sing a song he loved me singing at the funeral.  I loved William, he used to call me his adopted daughter.  He died suddenly whilst in hospital waiting for them to attend to him at the age of 57.  I had tried to practice last week and just ended up in floods of tears, so on the morning of the funeral I decided to try and practice again.  It’s a song that William who was a preacher would have me sing night after night about a decade ago when he was preaching every night at a church in Blackpool.  This was the church that they were holding the funeral at.  I knew it would be strange to be back in that building, singing that song at William’s funeral.  It’s a song I knew back to front and inside out even a decade later.  I spent the morning singing (Nana sorted the children’s breakfasts, just crumpets that morning) and then getting ready.  My mum was going to have the children for me, I realised four on her own was a bit harsh as I had no idea how long we would be (I had to be there early to set up etc.), so we took Eden with us, she’s never any trouble and if James needed to go out of the main room with her, he could.

The weather was terrible so my Mum was just staying in with the other three.  The girls understood what I was going to do and didn’t mind it interrupting their holiday (bless them).  Lots of kisses, cuddles and off set James, Eden and I

Was really bizarre arriving there, William’s son Adam, just a child when I last saw him, had been recently ordained in the Summer (his Dad was there to see that – ‘proudest day of his life’) and was leading the funeral.  He was giving the eulogy, along with William’s boss, he was also preaching, and when we arrived he was sorting out the words onto the overhead projector and sorting out the sound desk.  Shocked to see him there so early and to realise how much he was doing (instead of coming later with the family) I took over putting the words into the computer program, and Keith and I started to sort out the sound for our music, and made sure everything else they needed was working.

I kept my mind busy for the hour and a half that followed before the funeral commenced.  Sang my little heart out, and then went outside to have a little weep.  Strangely though, I don’t weep for the loss of William.  I believe I know where he has gone and that he will be at peace now, but seeing his wife and daughter (who was my friend years ago, we just lost contact when she got married – they are Romany Gypsy’s and have a very strong culture, her role was to stay in the home, look after her husband and have children) was the reason I wept.  I know we do not weep as those who have no hope as we believe we’ll see him again, but for those left behind it is hard as life adjusts.

 Above is one of William’s messages when he spoke at a church about a year ago.  Please watch if you want to see what all the fuss was about, his story of his life before and after meeting Jesus is amazing.  When his coffin was carried out at the end of the service yesterday there was a standing ovation and everyone applauded like when a ship makes it maiden voyage out of the harbour.  The next stage of his journey is just beginning.
So, back to the children.  My sister and her boyfriend had been at the funeral with James, Eden and I, we went back to collect the others and go out for ice-cream near the local lake.  It was so windy, so we sat inside the cafe.
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Judah and I making our way to the cafe

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Isis posing

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the whole clan plus Auntie Jenny, you can’t see James is holding the car seat behind the girls with Eden in it

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My little monkey

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Ordering their ice-creams

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Daddy photobombing indiscreetly

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Eden enjoyed her biscuit

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disappointed there’s no sweets left in the pic n mix

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Adam and Eden

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Adam playing helicopters with Shayla-Rae

I was exhausted when we got back from our little walk, with the emotional strain of the day, but dinner still needed to be made so off I went to the shop to get some mince.  I had planned to make chilli, it was a cold day so this seemed fitting.  In times like this I am grateful for the meal planner as it helps me to not have to make choices when I’m tired.  They all enjoyed the chilli and rice, then had some game time with Grandad before having a bath and going to bed.

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concentrating

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playing ‘Snorta’ with Grandad

Although today wasn’t the ideal ‘holiday’ day for the children, they had fun and what can I say? This is real life, and life doesn’t stop, it keeps going and situations happen.  I was pleased to be around the area to make it so accessible for us to continue our holiday and still be able to sing.

Tomorrow we’re taking Grandad out for a delayed birthday breakfast as we were busy with church festivities when they organised an impromptu dinner a fortnight ago.  Looking forward to that.

18 DAYS OF SUMMER #5

18 Days of Summer #5

Today was an interesting day, as somehow our Tax Credit renewal form had never been sent to us.  Therefore, we obviously hadn’t sent it back.  So our Child Tax Credits hadn’t gone in.  We had to get the car fixed last week, so you can imagine, this didn’t put us in good stead for days out with 4 children.  We barely had enough to buy nappies for the baby that had run out.  After some interesting phone calls, my inlaws to the rescue, lending us what HMRC would reinstate in a few weeks once we’ve had the form etc and got it back to them.  However, we didn’t have money until later in the afternoon when they had transferred it so we scaled back our ideas for the day.

In the morning (before I realised we were running out of nappies) I was driving my Mum to work (we’re staying at her home) and thought it would be a good time to grab some one on one time with Isis.  I asked James if he minded us having an hour, he replied, ‘of course not,’ so off I went with Isis.

We went to Costa as it had a free car park right outside.  I got my usual Decaf Gingerbread Latte and Isis tried a ‘Sticky Toffee Creamy Cooler’ she let me have a sip, way too sickly for me but she loved it.

showing off her fishtail

showing off her fishtail

Normally, in a ‘Just the 2 of us’ post I would have more pictures and what we chatted about.  Isis and I ended up having a very personal conversation, she offloaded something she had been carrying around for 3 years and broke down on me in the middle of Costa.  It was so sad, but also very precious that we were able to bond on an even deeper level.  As you can appreciate, this blog is for them, and some things are just meant to be shared between stepmum and daughter.

My sister contacted me whilst in Costa (she lives around the corner) and came to meet us as we finished up so she could get a lift back with us to spend some time with the children.  On the way back we nipped to the Pharmacy, I had taken a picture of Judah’s face.  He’d fallen the day before and below the little graze on his face was slightly raised, red and warm.  After Eden having had cellulitis twice, I just wanted to check it wasn’t worrying.  The pharmacist advised me it was probably normal, and he’d just grazed it over more surface area than I thought and to keep my eye on it.  When I got back I did the usual mum trick and smothered it in sudocrem (again), it did look better later in the day, so my heart was at peace.

We spent some time debating what we could do with no money, the babies were all napping, so rather than the girls just watch television we decided to play the ‘Game of Life’ this was great.  I meant to capture a photo of the carnage on the table, but was just enjoying being with the children so much, I forgot.  I love making memories for them, but sometimes you just don’t want to be the lady with the camera in her hand all the time.  I want to be in the moment with them, as well as capturing it for them, there is definitely a fine line and I am still learning this balance.

Once the babies were awake, and I had annihilated everybody in the Game of Life we had some tortilla wraps for lunch and then went off to the park again.  This time Judah and Eden were awake and could join in.

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Judah with Auntie Jenny

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my turn, my turn

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enjoying the climbing frame

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conveniently peeping over so I could snap this

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Eden’s 1st go on the swing

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our pint-sized princess

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‘oooh what’s this?’

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Judah getting braver every day

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Ready, steady….

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…Go!!!

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Judah almost brave enough to go on the swings on his own again, thanks to Auntie Jenny

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Daddy kisses

James later tried to swing in one of these baby seats, this was interesting and required some assistance from myself to get him out.  This is not unusual behaviour from my husband, although hilarious, especially for the children, not often appreciated by myself *wink*.
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He asked me afterwards, ‘what would you have done if it had ended up with us having to get the Fire Brigade?’ I replied after careful thought, ‘take pictures.’
Check out Eden’s first time on the swing
James’ parents contacted us to say they had transferred us some money, how kind, and we then went to get the children an ice-cream.  I restrained as I’m still trying to lose weight.  James is becoming more and more impressed with my resilience as this theme has continued throughout our time away with the girls.  Here’s a couple of snaps of them enjoying their ice-creams.
James managed to catch a cheeky snap of me whilst queuing for the ice-cream

James managed to catch a cheeky snap of me whilst queuing for the ice-cream

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In the evening I had planned for us to all have Fajitas.  James cooked for us all, I’m very lucky, and the food was massively enjoyed by all.

What’s your favourite dinner to come home to after a day in the summer sun?  Comment below.

18 DAYS OF SUMMER #6

18 Days of Summer #6

Sitting down to write this whilst all the rest of the family are asleep in bed (I am sat in bed next to the hubster who is fast asleep), I am very tired after a busy day, but I feel very blessed.  Today was one of those days that my heart just feels so full, full of love, joy, pride of how blessed and lucky we are to have such amazing children.

As I mentioned last week at some point, I’ve been asked to sing at a funeral tomorrow of a good friend.  They wanted me to play piano and to sing, but I know that I’ll be emotional and it’s been a while since I’ve accompanied myself for such an occasion, so I called a friend yesterday to see if they mind playing for me, then all I need to do is sing.  He kindly agreed, he was a friend of the gentleman that died too, so he saw it as an honour and a privilege.  However, this meant that we would need to practice, so as we finished the conversation yesterday, we arranged a practice today at 10am.

A friend recommended a hairstyle for the girls to try today – the ‘mermaid braid,’ I definitely have not perfected this one, but the girls loved it and the tighter version I put in Shayla’s hair survived all day, and looked great when they were playing in the water.  Definitely would recommend as a swimming do.

Isis' looser version

Isis’ looser version

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Shayla’s stayed in all day

As the girls are always so well-behaved (not a brag, they just are and I know that we are very lucky) and into music, I thought I would take them with me.  They were so excited to be in my friend Keith’s studio.  I explained to them that it was where I recorded some songs I wrote when I was 16.  They were amazed by how long ago that was *shudders*, so am I.
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lovely moment, Isis singing in the studio I recorded in 15 years ago

lovely moment, Isis singing in the studio I recorded in 15 years ago

The girls had a go at drumming too, I think we’re going to need a music room instead of a playroom as these children get older.

Isis sang for Keith, a friend of my parents who helped me record an album of songs I wrote at 16. It was such a special moment, I sat down at the piano and played Katy Perry’s ‘Firework’ and she just went for it. I was so proud that she didn’t go all shy on me, she shone like the little star that she is, and Keith said that he will gladly record a song for her for free anytime that she wants. So lovely, we’re thinking of maybe doing a little family album of songs for Grandparents for Christmas presents. I know James’ parents would especially adore a recording of Isis as they’re always trying to capture her on their phones when they come up to visit.

We left our friends home and went back to our holiday home (my parents), I made and packed up a picnic, James had snagged some bargain priced roast chicken the night before as Booths were closing up, so I made chicken sandwiches.  We took apples, raisins, drinks, and some Peppa Pig muddy puddle chocolate bars too, and off we went on our travels.  We decided to go on the bus to save on car parking at the other end and headed to St Annes on the Sea.

our little bus crew off on their travels

our little bus crew off on their travels

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practicing their ballet stretches whilst waiting for the bus

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James looking confused by the bus ticket

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smiling – that’s better

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Eden looking after Judah’s kermit

We went to visit Nana at work, she wanted her work colleagues to meet the children and then we were off to the paddling pool near the beach to eat our picnic (I was hungry by now for sure).  The girls munched down all their food, Judah had fallen asleep as we were getting off the bus, so he napped as they played for a while and then was able to join in.  He’s potty training at the moment, so as soon as he woke, poor child was put on the potty, then had his sandwiches – which I have NEVER seen him shovel down so fast as he was so excited to go and play in the water.

picnic time

picnic time

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strawberry munching Isis

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cute holding hands

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they figured out it was warmer if they stayed low out of the wind

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Judah shovelling in his sandwiches

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getting his big sister

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crazy bendy child

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I love this photo, he’s so happy

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telling his sisters what to do

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The weather was warm but as we were on the seafront it was VERY windy.  Judah was shivering but refusing to come out of the water as he was having so much fun.  Ended up making a judgement call after about 20 mins of them all playing that they would all come out and we’d head to the trampolines.  My mum had finished work and had come to join us by this point.  We got them all dry and back into their clothes and off we trekked.

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walking with Nana

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Isis loves the trampolines

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My two bouncing girlies

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having the time of his life

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cheeky face

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he loves trampolines, can you tell?

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monster shadows

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As we were walking down to the trampolines, Judah spotted ‘the beach’ well, he wasn’t happy, screaming and performing because he wanted to go on the beach ‘like it beach!’ he kept screaming.  Obviously, I didn’t want him to be sad or feel like he was missing out but I knew that he would love the trampolines and nobody else wanted to go on the beach today (we’ll be going another day).  He was tired from all the playing in the water and trying to keep his body warm.  So, into the Bugaboo Donkey he went.  Ooh, he wasn’t happy, lots of screaming, lots of typical stares from people walking past, assuming that I must be throttling my 2 year old.  He watched the girls on the trampolines and had to calm down dramatically before I would let him even contemplate having a go.

He did eventually calm down and he loved his time on the trampolines, he has a little one in the playroom at home, and he just loves to jump.  He had a great time.  When his time was up (it was £2.50 for 10 minutes), the screaming recommenced as he didn’t want to come out.  We had told him it was ice-creams next, which meant that he walked off the trampoline of his own accord, but then being 2 changed his mind once there was no more bounce beneath his footsteps. It’s hard being 2.

Again, he had to calm down, this took longer as there was an audience, we knew he’d had a lot of excitement and was upset so he couldn’t go and choose his ice-cream until he’d done a wee on the potty.  Not normally a problem for him, but he decided all of a sudden he was embarrassed to go on the potty (which he had done several times already that day).  Nana and her friends left for a coffee (don’t think they could cope with any more screaming) and he focused on my voice then, calmed down, went on the potty and was able to choose an ice-cream (he went for an ice-lolly) to eat on the walk back to the bus stop.

He walked all the way back to the bus stop, it took us about 25 minutes with his little legs, and then when we got off the bus at the other side, he walked all the way back to Nana’s house, about 15 minutes for his legs.  When we arrived home I realised how proud I was of him and the day he had done, no accidents all day, even though we were out with multiple distractions, how far his little legs had walked, for the first time ever really.  We had been aiming to go to the Blackpool church service our church is running at the moment, the children wanted to go, but again we made a judgement call, they’d been out in the sun all day.  They had been so well behaved and we would be pushing our luck to try and take them to church for a 7:30 service.

So, we stayed in, got a chippy dinner and watched ‘Matilda.’  The children had a wonderful day and were telling me about their favourite parts, Isis’ and Judah’s was the trampoline, Shayla’s was the paddling pool.  I had a lovely time realising how blessed James and I were, and look forward to more days out.  We are a third through our days now, and that makes me sad, but still 12 days to go.  Tomorrow I am singing at a funeral, so it won’t be the most fun of mornings/early afternoons, but then we will go into Blackpool to do something fun, so I’m looking forward to that.

I’ll leave you with a little clip of the crazy children doing an impression of their Father falling off the roundabout the day before, but for some reason in the water.